A Day in the Life of Dick and Jane

I found this poem in an old book from 1983 titled, "Why I Hate Men."

I think it accurately describes the typical marriage relationship as the majority of my life has been commited to one man on two separate occassions. Since I have the benefit of having been married and divorced twice, I can provide accurate details based on life experience for what is common. Hope you enjoy...

6 a.m.
See Jane wake up.
Up, Jane, up.
See Jane clean the
bathroom.
Ugh, ugh, ugh.
And do her exercises.
Puff, puff, puff.

See Dick roll over
and go back to sleep.
Sleep, sleep, sleep.

8 a.m.
See Jane cook.
Cook, cook, cook.
See Dick and Dickie, Jr.
Eat, eat, eat.

See Jane finish cooking.
See Dick finish eating.

8:45 a.m.
See Dick go to work.
See Jane take Dickie to school
before she goes to
Work, work, work.

Work, Jane, work.

3 p.m.
See the Day Care call Jane
because Dickie doesn't feel well.
Sick, Dickie, sick.

Hear Jane's boss
complain
because Jane has to leave early.

See Dick sit behind his desk
in his office.
Sit, Dick, sit.

See Jane take Dickie home.
Nurse, nurse, nurse.
See Jane run to the store.
Shop, shop, shop.

6:00 p.m.
See Dick come home.
Dick is tired.
See Dick lie down.
Snooze, Dick, snooze.

See Jane cook.
See Dick eat.
See Dickie, Jr. eat.
Soup, soup, soup.

8:30 p.m.
See Jane wash dishes.
See Jane do laundry.
See Jane wax floors.
See Dick watch television.

10:00 p.m.
Dishes, dishes, dishes.
Laundry, laundry, laundry.
Floors, floors, floors.

See Dick read a book.
Read, read, read.
Snooze, snooze, snooze.
Television, television, television.
Eat, eat, eat.
Sleep, sleep, sleep.

12 Midnight
Bed, Jane, bed.
Hurry up and sleep.
It's almost
dawn, dawn, dawn.

6 a.m.
Oh, my, Jane, Dick is
horny, horny, horny.
Again, again, again.

See Dick and Jane play.
Pant, pant, pant.

6:30 a.m.
Watch Jane get
up, up, up.
While Dick goes back to
sleep, sleep, sleep.

See Jane
Ugh, ugh, ugh.
Puff, puff, puff.
Cook, cook, cook.
Nurse, nurse, nurse.
Work, work, work.
Shop, shop, shop.
Errands, errands, errands.
Run, run, run.

Faster, Jane, faster.
Or Dick might get
bored, bored, bored.

And find another woman he
likes better than you.

And you might get a
divorce, divorce, divorce.

Wouldn't that be
awful?

My hope for your home is not like this example but if it is...

See Jane
pray, pray, pray.
See Dick
grow, grow, grow.
See Dickey
learn, learn, learn.

In HIS time.